i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
