Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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