Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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