Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Randomize
