Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
