Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
