i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
