ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize