East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
