Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
