I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Randomize
