there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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