the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
where does the pee come out of this thing
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Randomize
