I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
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