from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
