if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
