omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Randomize
