Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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