Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
