Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
