it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize
