She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
