i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
