Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
