i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
