Define "chronic" masturbator.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Randomize
