Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Randomize
