I met the friendliest cop last night
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
