Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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