You're completely useless in the revolution.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Damn victory sex feels great
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
