so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Randomize
