is your mom at the bar?
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
she woke up with a sticky ear
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
