She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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