I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
