There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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