More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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