it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Randomize