he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize