I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
