He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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