Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
