You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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