Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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