she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
