spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
