By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
