dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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