I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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