Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
