Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
