Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
We are all done wearing pants today
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
